Brevity of Life

"Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away." -James 4:14

I have been thinking a lot about the end, the end of my life that is.  Being 25, some people might think I'm crazy, but there is a reality that each of us faces, that being the end of our lives.  For most people, the end comes in a somewhat timely fashion, when we are of old age, and after we've accomplished everything life seems to offer.  For others, it is untimely, in a moment, and without warning.  Regardless of when that time comes, it will come.


I think about life and all the moments of time that are often swallowed up by waste, taken for granted, and not cherished because of the wrong perspective, or because our eyes are fixed on the future.  Mondays are often filled with dread, wishing that Friday would come quicker.  Engagements are often not treasured as the bride and groom long with eager anticipation for the day of the wedding.  Marriages are often neglected as the couple works endless hours trying to save up enough money to by that dream house they've always wanted.  Whatever the case might be, life is often taken for granted.  Moments are missed and opportunities lost.


The Lord has graciously given each individual an allotted amount of years.  The Psalmist writes, in Psalm 139, that the days of each individuals life were written and thought out before the person was even a thought to their mother.  We don't decide how many days we get, but we do hold responsibility for what we do with those days.  Will we treasure them and use them for their intended purpose, or will we waste them and sacrifice time for our own purposeless endeavors.


We must often think about our dying in order to get the right perspective on life.  It must not be a depressing thought but rather a motivating one.  Knowing that the Lord is at work in us for His good pleasure and purposes should encourage us.  Looking at each day as if it were our last will enable us to focus on what really matters, eternal things.  Those mundane things because purposeful, we find contentment with circumstances we are in today, and we treasure each day and season, rather then fixating on what's next.  Because the truth is, what's next isn't promised, just today.


Life is short, a vapor, as the writer of James speaks of.  We can't forget that.

Don't Presume

To presume, to expect something with confidence; to take for granted; to suppose to be true, or come to be, without proof.

Whether it is because of the culture, my own sinful flesh, the enemy, or a mix of all three, I find myself presuming upon the grace of God.  It is always more evident in the large things in life, such as graduating from college, finding a job, or getting married; yet it is often a daily occurrence in even the small things.  The fact that I woke up this morning able to see and walk, taken for granted.  The roof over my head or the meal I just ate, often that too is taken for granted.  Yes, I may say a prayer before I eat that meal thanking the Lord for His provision, but in my heart, I have expected it.  I suppose it is in the bigger things that I notice my presumption, because it has been in those things, that God has reminded me of His control, my lack of faith, and His graciousness in giving good gifts.  In the big things, I've learned patience, the power of prayer, and the consequences of trying to control it myself.  I've learned lessons, often the hard way because of my presumption upon His grace.  And yet, I find myself forgetting how inclined I am to presume upon His grace in my life.

Recently, I have had the privilege of reading a handful of books on the Gospel; words spoken that have moved me to tears, Biblical truths that have refocused my heart, and reminders of its centrality in my life.  The more that I focus on the Gospel, the more I see my undeservedness, not only of salvation, but of everything, and, the less tempted I am to presume upon the grace of God.  When I see myself from a Biblical perspective, I am reminded from where I came, and from what I've been redeemed from, forever.  I am blessed with the ability to see the privilege it is to take every breath, and the fact that with each breath, God's grace is sustaining me.  I am humbled to know that I can sit at His feet and learn from His Word  And I am motivated by the power from the Gospel, to holy-living.  The Gospel reminds each of us of the danger of presumption, and that all gifts are from His loving hand- the most wonderful being salvation.

Presumption has seeped into the body of Christ, and we must battle it.  We must refocus our hearts and minds each day on what is TRUE (Philippians 4:8).  We must guard our minds from the cultural mindset that we deserve certain necessities or wants.  We must never think that God owes us a college degree, a job, a spouse, a child, or a home.  We must never base His faithfulness on ours, the two do not go hand in hand.  His grace is manifested ultimately in the cross, the redemption of our souls, and then daily in our life here on earth.  His grace is seen differently in each of His children's lives.  From Isaiah who was asked to be faithful to preach knowing he would see no fruit from the ministry he had been called to; to Job who was challenged to exhibit trust and faith even when everything temporal had been removed from his hands, and even though He was obedient; to Mary who was asked to carry the Savior of the world knowing she would experience persecution and pain; to Noah who was asked to build a boat, never having seen rain, and enduring ridicule and mockery day after day; to the disciples who were called to make fishers of men and give up their very lives in doing so.

His grace is sufficient for each person, in the perfect way it needs to be.  Never presume upon it, never take it for granted, but rather treasure it, pray for it, depend upon it for your very lives, for it is by His grace alone that you breathe.

Christian Husbanding

After almost 9 months of marriage I cannot begin to describe how much of a blessing it is. It is truly a gift, one that has humbled, encouraged, stretched, and sanctified me in incredible ways. Vanessa and I were made one in the eyes of God and in the eyes of the Church on July 9, 2011. And with each day passing day, we both see more and more of that reality in each other.

What I mean by that is that although we were declared one at the moment we entered into the covenant of marriage, we had not yet begun to live as one in our daily lives. And in the first 9 months of marriage, I know we both realize all the more that the process of learning to live as one will continue until He calls one us home to Him.

In it all, here are three of the most important things that I’ve learned [oftentimes the hard way] in the last 9 months:

1)   Pray. Pray again. Then pray some more.

Prayer is an often neglected spiritual discipline. I believe it is so neglected because it is so powerful. And our own flesh, partnered with the pervasive influence of the devil, is going to do everything in its power to convince us otherwise. But as we desire daily to be transformed in our minds through God’s Word, we read that “the effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much” (James 5:16b). The bible is full of testimonies of how much prayer can accomplish. Here are a few examples:

• Through prayer, the Spirit helps us in our weakness and intercedes for us according to the will of God (Romans 8:26-27).
• Through prayer, we realize that God’s grace is sufficient for us, regardless of the situation we are in (2 Corinthians 12:8-10).
• Through prayer, our spirits are strengthened, our faith is increased, our love is deepened, and our knowledge of Christ’s glory is expanded (Ephesians 3:14-19).
• Through prayer, God’s peace consumes us and God grows us in our contentment (Philippians 4:6-7, 10-13).
• Through prayer, God’s will is revealed to us, that we might walk in Him and bear the fruit of righteousness (Colossians 1:9-11).

        Prayer can indeed accomplish much!

With that said, prayer is the means by which the hearts of a husband and wife are increasingly united. When you approach the God’s throne of grace together, you come as one: one heart, one mind, and one voice. God sees you as one, as that is a foundational principle as to what marriage is: two becoming one. And as you pour out your heart in requests to God, your wife will be made more aware of what is burdening you. As a result, your burdens will naturally become their burdens, and her burdens will become yours. Your hearts will become united. Your pursuits will become united. Your purposes will become united. As a couple, prayer one of the powerful tools that will help you become more of what you already are (ONE in Christ).

2)   Intentions don’t mean anything. Words and actions mean everything.

Words and actions are things that are actually said or done; and our intention or reason for saying those words or doing those things is not always communicated or clearly seen. Let’s face it: we as men are more sinful and selfish than we know. We oftentimes say or do things that ultimately hurt those closest to us (our wives). Some of the hurt caused is positive and brings good outcomes (wisdom, illumination, repentance, forgiveness, etc.); but most of it leads to negative consequences (distance, frustration, anger, etc.). And even though a response to something said or done might be sinful, we are implicated in that sin. Here’s how I get there:

As husbands we are called to know our wives intimately (one of the foundational principles behind being one flesh). But in our selfishness (laziness is a form a selfishness) we often don’t invest the time we should in getting to truly know them. This lack of discipline (spending time getting to know your wife) leads to a lack of understanding (of who your wife is and what she needs) which leads to a lack of ability (living and communicating with your wife as ONE in Christ). In our lacking ability we say and do things that hurt (even with the best of intentions). Our ignorance (of our wife) implicates us (of wife’s sin).

Spend time truly getting to know your wife, and communicate with her your desire to do so. In the end, you’ll better understand who she is and how she operates. Your intentions for doing or saying things will become transparent, and you will be better equipped to serve her and build her up with your every word and action. Realize that what you say and what you do mean everything. Be faithful in both (do what you say and say what you do). As her leader, it’s what you’re expected to do.

3)   Just because something is deemed as being spiritual doesn’t mean it’s truly spiritual.

Are we not exhorted to do all things unto God’s glory, regardless of whether it’s as simple eating or drinking (1 Corinthians 10:31)? For Christians, there is no longer this separation between the secular and the sacred (spiritual) in terms of our conduct. In all things we are called to be spiritual-minded: our focus should always be to glorify God.

So spending time with your wife on the couch or listening to her tell you about her day can be just as spiritual as reading the Word and praying with her. And reading the Word and praying with her can be just as unspiritual as anything else you do together. Yes, I said and meant unspiritual. Your motive is key; your heart motivation in it.

• Do you read, study, and pray with your wife because you genuinely desire to love and nourish her as Christ does His Church, or do you just want to give the impression that you do? Said another way, are you motivated by duty or desire?
• Does your heart burn for God’s glory as you listen to your wife tell you about her day as much as it does as when you lead her in prayer and through the Word? It should.

And just because what your doing doesn’t involve doing something spiritual (Word or prayer) doesn’t mean it isn’t. Cherish and redeem every moment and everything you do with your wife – for God’s glory!

While these experiences might be specific to the relationship between husband and wife, I believe their application is broader. So for you boyfriends and fiancés (and anyone else who feels called by God unto marriage) these are things to think about and meditate on.

Regardless of who you are, I pray that my experiences might be an encouragement to you. May our lives be aligned to the truth of God’s world and to the example of godly brothers and sisters in Christ around us.

“We proclaim Him, admonishing every man and teaching every man with all wisdom, so that we may present every man complete in Christ. For this purpose also I labor, striving according to His power, which mightily works within me.” –Colossians 1:28-29