When I Am Weak, HE IS STRONG

I suppose I should change the title of my blog to something about being a mom because that is all I tend to be writing on lately.  This new calling in my life has been such a tool of sanctification and such a blessing.  I am amazed at how the Lord finds new things to teach me everyday.  Daily I have a front row seat to my own depravity.  Whether it is seen in my impatience, my lack of grace, my frustration, or my worry...I fail, every, single, day. 

Growing up in a Christian home was a blessing.  The Lord graciously spared me from a lot because of it, and for that I am thankful.  However, because of that, there has been a struggle throughout my Christian walk with my ability to see the depravity of my heart apart from Christ.  I have always seen my sin, but my pride has often gotten in the way and made me believe that because my sin isn't x, y, or z...I'm not as bad as Joe Smith down the street.  "How could someone do something so evil?" is a phrase that has often left my mouth.  The Lord, in His grace, is quick to remind me of my need for grace however, as He reveals sin to me often and I see my failure regularly.  Although I may not be doing those "terrible" sins, from my perspective, every sin that I commit is against a holy and perfect God who sacrificed His Son for even the smallest sin I let myself slip into.  A humbling reality to think about.

I'm not going to lie and say that I haven't been discouraged, because I have been, many times.  I have found myself wondering why I struggle so much with something, or how I can be so sinful.  I find myself begging God for grace and forgiveness throughout the day, and asking Him to strengthen me in so many areas.  But I have recently been encouraged by the fact that when I am faithless, weak, and failing, HE alone is faithful, strong, and victorious! 2 Corinthians 12:9 says, "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."

Therefore I CAN and MUST rejoice every single day knowing that no matter how many times I fail in my calling as a mom (often), He NEVER fails.  I have come to realize that I am going to fail my son, I already have.  I am going to sin against him, regularly; I am going to say the wrong things, not say the right things, do the wrongs things, or not to do the right things, etc.  I am a sinner, in desperate need of grace, and he will see that often.  Yet, God WILL use my weaknesses to show HIS strength, goodness, and power.  The Gospel will be on display through it all.  My prayer is that when I am weak, Brayden will see that HE IS STRONG!